Elizabeth Shepherd

11 December 2009 By Lyov 0 In Jazz

Parkdale

Liner Notes:
I’ve been living here since the move from Montreal, 4 years ago. It’s a harsh neighbourhood – but then again, so is life. In this city that values aesthetic functionality and uniformity over allowing its history to be told through age and decay, Parkdale has largely managed to resist the gentrification that has hit much of Toronto. Some maintain that the tide is inevitable. I believe that as long as there is a place for the stalwart halfway houses and homes for those deemed mentally or emotionally “unstable”, Parkdale won’t see the marginalization of certain members of society, the way so many other neighbourhoods have. And in the end, I hope this is exactly what will allow for its preservation, in all its complexities and myriad stories. Like it or not, beyond the homogenized, picture-perfect bullshit that creeps up everywhere to call itself reality, lies the actual, true core – often harsh and ugly and full of contradictions, yet incredibly beautiful in its realness and resilience. So to me, Parkdale is a window into the soul of a city – complex, fragmented and above all, honest.

On a personal note, I’ve been on a quest to discover and accept who it is that I am, by slowly stripping away the layers. I have felt inextricably linked to my neighbourhood through this all; I have identified with it, and it has in turn shaped me and given rise to a host of creative efforts – most notably the tunes that are on this album. I remember the lyrics for Sicilienne weaving through my head as I walked along the lakeshore in the blistering summer sun, or the melody for Parkdale composed anxiously in my apartment, waiting for the cops to arrive as my neighbour (again) beat his wife. I remember the moment I found new love on Marion Street, and the ensuing questioning and testing of that love that became Higher Ground, or the late-night self-loathing and harm that turned out to be integral to exorcising childhood demons that made their way onto the album in quiet ways.
There is nothing grandiose or lovely or fun about the process of growth and change; it is both difficult and necessary. In fact, there’s only one way to transcendence – right through the middle of whatever needs to be overcome. And while the pain may often outweigh the transcendence, maybe that’s precisely what pushes us forward, to keep moving on. At least that’s what I see around me: that stronger than despair is life, no matter how frail or fractured, or how subtle the near-extinguished flicker in someone’s eyes may be. The very fact that we still breathe and grace the streets in sometimes tentative steps is a testament to the irrepressible will to live. This is what inspires me the most. So it is only fitting that I dedicate the album to this place – Parkdale – and all the souls who call it home.
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